Rumours that this film is ok have been
Godfuckingdamn this is a crap film. I am filled with FURY over how crap it is.
Firstly - i am not a comic book fan boy. I really don't like them very much, and never fell into that particular addiction. So, this isn't a "omgwtf did they do with that character!!111" kind of hatred of this film. I hate it all on its own, or at least in connection with the other two.
Even skipping over the massive continuity issue in the film and the annoyance of people not taking the existence of superpowers to its logical conclusion... skipping over the pseudoscience of "mutation"... there's just the systematic destruction of all the characters' motivations, and sometimes existence.
Lets go through them, shall we:Prof X
: I am an ethical, wise counsellor. That's why I will mess with people's minds without asking them, and try repression and denial as a way of dealing with psychological issues. Yeah, baby. Magneto
: I have a solid motivation to fight against the tyranny of humanity. It might be painted with obvious and broadstrokes, but you can sympathise with me, yah? Gotcha! In this film I drop that pretense and just become a bad guy! Woo! I'll betray my closest affiliates because they saved me and became normal! Screw helping them out! Screw loyalty! Screw your sympathy! Scott
: Hey - WARGH. Iceboy
: Wooo, my Leave-it-to-Beaver looks make me the new lead too-good boy. Stuff you Scott, you're gone!Rogue
: I'm sad that my boy is looking to another girl. Even though everytime I'm on screen, we're arguing or at least not getting on. And he never actually does anything with her. Kitty
: I'm just here to provide dramatic tension with the other two, because the tension between Scott - Jean - Wolverine is gone and we had to replace it with something.Wolverine
: I've been taking anger management classes and have overcome my internal conflicts. I realise that those conflicts also drove me to instinctively rebel, so I won't do that any more. I'm just a normal nice guy. Oh, until there's a fight, in which case I will butcher my way through hundreds of people with no dramatic tension because I'm unstoppable. *yawn*Blueguy
: who the hell is this?Blueguy
: oh, i don't need to be introduced. I'll just show up and be sort of like a calm Wolverine. Except he's all calm too. Horde of black clad mooks
: We're in black with weird hair, tattoos and piercings, so you can tell we're bad. And the best thing about these hoods is that you can't see our faces, so we're really a horde of faceless mooks.
Sure, they were 2 dimensional, but this film even removes that. The director/writers made HALLE BERRY
look like she could act by making everyone else as boring as she normally is. That's not a skill, that's a special sort of curse.
Also general ranting:
* where's the teleporty guy? Get him, find out where Magneto is, flick him in, steals the hat, ProfX eats his brain. The end.
* "Scott's gone!" Remember that big mutant detecting computer you have? the one that gets no mention at all in the whole film?
* where the fuck does all this hightech crap come from anyway?
* why the hell would you transport 3.. THREE dangerous mutants together?
* "This is a war!" Then get someone that can run one. You suck, Magneto. Take a goddamn BOAT! Your stupid bridge trick meant that troops could come up behind you. Also, use the weapons you have, don't wait until they've killed half your forces, then use the more powerful ones. Also, SF bay is full of container ships, wait till one goes past Alcatraz, start pulling them off and dropping them on the facility until the girl who can sense mutants tells you the little kid is dead. Also, how can she detect him?
* where was the humour? The first two had a couple of great moments where I couldn't stop giggling. I think I sniggered once in this one.
I stand by my initial evaluation - I'd rather watch Electra than watch this again.